What I Don’t Want You To Know But Am Telling You Anyway

What if I told you that I am afraid most days? What if I told you that growing my business and putting my name and face in front of the world is scary?

When my clients hit rough patches in their business, I tell them that starting and growing purpose-driven businesses is one of the most challenging personal development programs you could undertake. It requires you to face your fears and work though them if you want to make your business work.

Here’s my latest “scared as hell” business story. I figured I’d come clean: I can be a big fraidy cat, but I face my fears and do it anyway.

A True Story

I recently set out to raise $5000 for a nonprofit organization called Charity Water.

This one small act stirred up a pot of fear and self-doubt. Here are some of the thoughts that went through my head:

“Shit! What did I just commit to?!”
“What if I can’t do it?”
“I better make it happen or everyone will think I’m a loser!”

Fortunately, I have life coaching skills in my back pocket and use this mental garbage as an opportunity to address my fears and move forward anyway.

The Commitment

My commitment to raise money for Charity Water came on the heels of Founder Scott Harrison’s presentation at the World Domination Summit in early July. At the end of his talk, he challenged each of use to “give up our birthdays” to raise money to bring clean water to those who need it most. Of course, I stood up, along with 999 other attendees.

I was committed. Gulp.

Going for It

Knowing my birthday was less than 3 weeks away, I had little time to think about my commitment. I’m a planner, but there was only so much time to plan. I dove right in and signed up.

Charity Water encourages people do ask for donations in dollars equivalent to their age in years. For me, that’s 34. I thought, “I’ll raise $3400. Surely I can find 100 people to donate.” That’s a small fraction of my list, and they’d do it for me, right? Heck, it’s a write off for them!

On the signup page, as I’m setting up my campaign, the online wizard says, “If you raise $5000, that can fund an entire project for 250 people.” Without further thought, I upped my commitment from $3400 to $5000.

I stepped up. I was locked in. Double gulp.

Moment of Panic #1

Not long after I committed to $5000, I freaked out. Self-doubt, worry, panic, fear, and doom colored my day.

How was I going to raise $5000? Would people give to this cause? Do they understand how big this issue is? Does anyone care enough to contribute?

My First Donation

To seed the campaign, I donated $340. It felt like a fun and easy number. I certainly can afford $340. Most people can. I thought that if I did something easy and fun, others would follow.

Moment of Panic #2

Then panic and fear set in again. Was $340 enough? Should I have seeded it with $1000? What’s the right amount? What feels good? What would everyone think?

(If you’re thinking I’m always a cool cat, I hope you can see that is far from the case. I’m quite normal. Wait, is this normal?)

Again, I calmed my fears and kept moving forward.

Sticking with It

One of the downsides of being an over-achiever go-getter is that when I really commit to something, I stick to it. For this campaign, I’m in all the way.

I’ve asked family and friends to chip in. I’m hosting a free class to support the cause. I have a few other tricks up my sleeve. I’m counting on the generosity of strangers to make it happen.

I may not reach my goal. People may not contribute. I may fall short.

I’m okay with this, I think.

Most importantly, I’ve put it out there, and I’m giving it my best shot.

Of course I’ll be crossing my fingers that you will hop on over and make a tiny $34 contribution. (Yes, you. I’m taking to you.)

Even if you don’t, I’m glad you here, witnessing my fear and the fact that I’m doing it anyway, even though I’m terribly, horribly, woefully afraid.

Your turn

In the comments below, tell me…

1. When have you gone after something even if it scared you?

2. Do you ever think that everyone but you has it all together, only to find out we’re all hit these messy patches? (I do this all the time!)