Has business felt harder than you think it should? Most people wish business could be easier. Myself included!
You’ve most likely cried over your laptop, sweated over whether your clients would pay on time, and pulled one too many twelve-hour days just trying to make it work. I’ve done all of these things.
But thankfully, about a year ago, something shifted. Massively.
I put into practice a single, powerful concept that changed everything. As a result, in under a year, I’ve been able to triple my income and double my vacation and creative time. (And who doesn’t want that?!)
Maybe you’ve been trying to build your business the old school way – nose to the grindstone, hustle all the time, and plenty of blood, sweat, and tears. My guess is that you’re tired of doing things this way. It’s hard!
Thankfully this mode of building a business is going the way of the dinosaur.
The reason is because work doesn’t work without its counterpart: flow. The new model for building a business you love looks more like a tango than a one-way street.
As business owners we always have a choice: we can work just to get it done or we can work AND enjoy it. So many of us get stuck in the endless loop of just getting it done. But that leaves us burned out. And burnout is so not cool.
Instead, learning about masculine work energy and feminine flow energy, you can get more done and have more fun, making a massive difference.
This is exactly how everything shifted in my business (and my bank account) in the past year. Here’s how…
Masculine and Feminine in Your Business
You may be wondering: What are the masculine and feminine in terms of my business? How do they show up?
The traditional business world is run in a masculine way, so even if you’ve never called it this before, you inherently already know what it is. It shows up as the focused, get-things-done energy that wants to be in control and producing an income. This is the arrow-like focus that let’s you check boxes and feel like a warrior.
The masculine is deadlines, spreadsheets, crunch time, logic, and straight lines.
The feminine, on the other hand, thrives when the masculine loosens its grip. It craves space to create and expand. It builds the character of your brand and your business — the part that let’s people know that your business is YOU. It’s the personality and uniqueness that makes it yours and no one else’s.
The feminine is flexibility, joie de vivre, intuition, community, and fun.
Think of the masculine as the black outlines in a coloring book and the feminine as how you choose to color in the page. Do you use glitter, markers, pastels, a bedazzler, or thick gloppy paint? Your choice.
How This Affects Your Output
Many of us have the masculine down pat but are yearning to inject feminine juiciness into our business. Others of us have feminine creativity down pat but need the boundaries of the masculine to help us follow through and get things done.
Either way, when we spend too much time at one end of the spectrum business starts to feel a lot harder than it needs to. Operating exclusively in the high octane masculine leads to burnout and major stress whereas living only in the flowy feminine generates lots of good ideas, but lacks the structure to accomplish much.
Let’s say you have to write new sales copy. The masculine approach would be to sit at your desk until it’s done. Even if you’re in a creative drought. And even if you want to bang your head against the wall.
This is the perfect time to loosen up and let your feminine energy flow. Instead of forcing yourself to stay at your desk, the best thing for your business (and your mental and emotional well-being) is to take a bath, dance around your living room, or head off to your favorite inspiring locale. Just make sure you bring a notebook, because once you try out this flexibility, your ideas will come a lot faster.
I guarantee that you will write waaaay better copy than you would’ve if you just sat there forcing it out.
Where to Make Shifts
The major places in your business to look to check your masculine / feminine energy balance are the three C’s: calendar, clients, creativity.
Here’s what I want you to do.
Step 1. Look at the questions below. Notice how that area of your business runs now.
Step 2. Then consider how it would feel BEST for you to handle that area of your business based on your own unique strengths and choices.
Step 3. Be brave. Be willing to try something new and experiment in running this area of your business in a new way, a way that feels better to you and who you are.
Your Calendar
What kind of hours do you desire to keep?
How many days a week do you need or want to work?
What times of day do you work best?
What systems are in place to help you run things efficiently?
Your Clients
How have you set your calendar to serve your clients when it’s best for you?
Where are you and how are you dressed when you talk to clients?
How are you set up to have the most fun while bringing your clients your best?
Your Creativity
When are you most creative?
What do you do each day to feed your soul so that your ideas keep flowing?
What are you doing for fun?
What does your workspace look like?
Where are you when your best ideas come to you?
How This Shifted Everything (in the Best Way Possible)
My business is totally different today than it was a year ago, because I honestly answered these questions and played with how to best use my masculine and feminine energies to my greatest advantage. Gone are the days of doing things just because “I have to” or sitting at my desk for 8+ hours a day. Gone is my desk for that matter!
I feel more creatively feminine and like a business badass when I take the time to get dressed in something beautiful and put on my lipstick in the morning. Masculine + feminine in harmony.
I write a blog post and take a dance break in my living room. Kristen recommends tiaras while working on spreadsheets. Masculine + feminine in harmony.
This is why it was just as important that I took a largely unplanned unplugged vacation to Europe with my husband in November as it was to plan my 2014 launch schedule in October.
The feminine and masculine in harmony is how your business succeeds. Tweet that!
And lucky for you, you get to choose how to use each. It’s time to stop making your business so hard and instead embrace this new way of working.
Now it’s your turn!
I want to hear from you! Tell me…
Where do you see the masculine or feminine overriding parts of your business?
Which do you want to cultivate more of?
What’s one thing you can do (or stop doing) today to make your business easier and more in tune with your flow?
I can’t wait to read about your experiences, answer your questions, and start a conversation in the comments below!
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Sara Mazenko Kennedy, writer and professional life coach, helps you to simplify, organize and beautify everything from your closet to your career to your calendar. Together, you de-clutter your stuff, your mental energy, and your to-do list so you can live the magnificent life you’re meant to. Where you see confusion, she sees clarity. Where you feel defeated, she sees you rising like a phoenix. Where you feel blah, she sees your sparkle. Together, you’ve totally got this.
This post is right on time for me.
Today I moved 3x time before I got comfortable to work, coffee shop, the garden then finally the library.
Then asked myself what’s the vision for my day? Hell it was 4pm then.
I am so using this.
Malaika, I so have been there! And am happy this post was timely for you 🙂
Sometimes when I’m having a tough time getting started it’s the location and sometimes it’s just harnessing my ‘get it done’ masculine energy to not distract myself. Sounds like you’re figuring out what works for you! I also love doing compressed power half hours – they help me get way more done and use both my energies most effectively. Love the vision question too — great place to start! Thanks for your comment!
I’ve definitely felt very out of balance with this as of late. Living almost completely in the masculine. It’s been all “go go go”, hustle & get it done, and not leaving much time at all for flow, creativity, and fun. I think 2014 is going to call for a total overhaul of how I run things, how I spend my time in my business.
I want to cultivate more community, more joy, and more creativity into my biz. Being an artist, this means more time actually creating my work and less time sitting in front of the computer trying to build the business. (I mean, seriously, what am I building if I don’t create the product?!?!) It also means finding more joyful ways to work, and (for me, at least) more joyful and EFFICIENT ways to use social media. I’ll admit spending more time than I should doing this but not with enough focus. Think throwing spaghetti at the wall to see what sticks.
One thing I’m going to stop doing right after I send this is to stop being so ‘on’ all the time, stop being plugged in. I’m spending too much time doing the back end things and not enough time allowing myself to really live and be inspired. So I’m committing to spending way less time in front of the computer, and making the time I do spend count so I don’t end up pulling regular 12-hour days.
Thanks for the inspiration!
Candace, your comment makes me so happy! All this talk of joy AND efficiency is truly the only way we can build sustainable businesses that actually nourish us and are of great service. Way to go with knowing what you want to stop doing – keep us posted with how it’s going. We can all always use firsthand stories of making shifts like that.
I bet your creativity will bloom by this one act. Also, as for social media, I’d pick just one mode you really enjoy – maybe it’s Instagram since you’re an artist – and put your joyful, creative, and efficient energy toward that. I’ve found that worrying about more than one or two social media outlets is just a constant slow energy leak for me and doesn’t actually contribute to my business how I dreamed it would. Consequently, those half hearted efforts across many mediums didn’t help me build my biz but focusing one one or two I enjoy did. Good luck! Thanks for your awesome comment!
What a fabulous article! Thank you so much for bringing up the masculine and feminine energy.
One fun tip to get into your feminine that also helps me in biz is: (with a tiara on of course, yay!) Dancing out every thing that I am worried, blocked on or stressed about. Pandora Bollywood Workout station and the Madonna stations rock!
Thanks Sara!
What a great idea, Diana! Dance is one of my favorite ways to love that stagnant energy, but I never thought about dancing out the worry too. Thanks for your comment and for the tip!
This is a great post, I really needed this. I struggle when ever I try that masculine approach to my work.
Lots of business people I know are male and they work very much that way. They cannot understand how not everyone dances to their tune. It’s great to hear I’m not alone thinking the masculine way isn’t by far the only way.
Mervi, you’ve found your community here for learning about the myriad ways to grow your business that aren’t strictly the old school way. I’m so happy for this business building renaissance and it sounds like you are too. The more we try to build our businesses like someone else or how our more masculine energy focused counterparts do, the more we lose that special energy and character that makes our businesses uniquely us.
Something that helped me immensely was surrounding myself with other female business owners who ‘got’ what I was taking about. Either through a mastermind or class you’ve taken, I’d try to put together a small group like that. Community makes SUCH a huge difference (which is why the comments section of Jenny’s blog is so fun and useful) Good luck! Thanks for your comment!
Sara is a wonderful life coach, I highly recommend her!
And clients as fabulous as you make my job an absolute dream! Thank you, my dear!
Great post! I’ve heard about the yin/yang of working but this post outlines it in such a way that is aligned with my business. Thanks for the examples and questions!
Tanya, I’m so happy this is helpful for you! I know what a difference it made for me and want to shout it from the rooftops. If you get stuck on any Q’s, just jump back in here and I’d be happy to help you get unstuck. Thanks for your comment!
Jenny,I finally got around to reading this article and really appreciate the insight. Also, after reading some of the comments I am one of those people that need structure. The day goes by and before you know it the clock says 3pm. Yikes! Time to put it on the calendar and engage more in my creative side. Thanks so much for keeping me on the right track. YOU inspire me! Happy New Year. Cheers Barbara
Barbara, love that the article came for you at just the right time! I find that I usually think I can get waaay more done in the time I have allotted on the calendar than I actually can. (Caused by my positive outlook or superwoman complex I’m not sure!) What would happen though is I’d feel like a failure at the end of the day for not crossing everything off my list. So now I keep my schedule abd to-do list as short and compact as possible and it’s helped me be way more productive whole having more fun. I ask the question: “What’s most important to do next?” a lot. Happy New Year to you as you schedule and create with greater efficiency and joy!