There’s something unexpected that you have to do as your business grows.
When first faced with this, most people avoid it because it’s challenging. Eventually, you reach a point where it’s so in-your-face that you can’t ignore it any longer.
People still try to hang on to the old way as long as they can… to their own detriment.
I must develop this muscle if I want to continue to grow my business. It’s something you’re going to have to master if you want to grow yours, too.
Today I’m going to tell you what unexpected challenge I’m training myself to do in my business so I can get to the next level.
The good news is that even though it’s hard, it’s easy. You’ll see what I mean when you dive in.
What I Have to Do More Of
One of the great things about growing your business is that you have more people interested in working with you, interviewing you, partnering with you, meeting you for coffee, and picking your brain.
Although it’s an awesome feeling to know that your message is reaching more and more people, it’s also really stressful. In order to grow your own business, you have to be very deliberate about where you put your time, energy, and attention.
To do that, you have to do something that you probably don’t like to do: Say NO.
Why This Is So Important
As the owner, boss, CEO, and head honcho here at JennyShih.com, it’s imperative that I keep an eye on both the strategic vision and the details of my business.
This means I must evaluate the opportunities that come my way and ensure they serve my business’s greater purpose and long-term vision.
Simply liking someone isn’t a good enough reason to accept an interview request even if I’d love to. I have to see if that interview is for a large, hungry audience that consists of my target clients.
Accepting every request for a coffee date or a brain-picking session, though fun (??), could like be a huge time sink. Given time is one of my most precious resources, I must determine if a request serves my goals.
This doesn’t mean I say no to everything. I definitely say yes to the right opportunities at the right times.
To know what opportunities to jump on and which ones to decline, you must use your strategic thinking brain to help you decide each time an opportunity comes your way. Tweet that!
Afraid of Sounding Like a B*&%#
If you’re like me, you worry that saying no means you’ll come across as a cold-hearted, uncaring bitch.
It’s not like these are mean people asking for your time! You have so much to share! And you want to help as many people as possible!
I hear you, my friend.
This is also where we must get really honest about what you want.
Do you want to be a people-pleaser right now? Or do you want to make a big impact in the long run?
Why We MUST Do This
If Oprah said yes to everyone who asked for her time back in 90s and 00s, she would have never had time to create OWN, which now reaches over 70% of all U.S. households (though sadly not mine).
If you say yes to everyone who asks for your time right now, you won’t have the hours you need to build your business and serve your bigger purpose.
As Byron Katie says, “As no to you is a yes to me.” Or in this case, it’s a yes to your business, your vision, and the world-changing work you want to do. Tweet that!
How About You?
I’d love to hear from you on this.
Are you at the point in your business where you’re able to say YES a lot? Or are you having to say NO more frequently?
How do you feel about saying NO?
Do you find it challenging to honor your strategic vision as you respond to and execute on the daily tasks and requests?
What tips do you have for saying NO?
I look forward to reading your thoughts in the comments below!
As I was reading this, I pictured a sign over my desk with my goals written on it. I’m going to create that so I can quite literally keep an eye on my goals as I work and choose which things to say “no” to. Thanks, Jenny!
Love that, Becky! Knowing what your goals are absolutely makes it easier to say yes or no to the right things.
I LOVED this post. I’ve spent my entire life saying yes and it drained me so much physically, emotionally and spiritually to the point where I hit bottom in my early 20’s. I came to the conclusion (speaking only for myself) that my people-pleasing is selfish. I don’t want to feel uncomfortable in the moment when I say no. Too many “yes”, means everything is done sub-par and I’m not cool with that. Doesn’t mean it’s easy, though! Progress not perfection. Still working on it! Thanks Jenny!
Like that reframe, Mary! It’s true that to some extent we are being selfish by people pleasing — sort of amazing when you look at it like that. It’s also true that saying yes to everything means that things do suffer, and not just our health and wellness but also the quality of what we say yes to. Thanks for sharing your insights here.
Hi Jenny,
Saying NO is has big one of the greatest challenges.
I’m definitely not at the point where you are. But still I think that there are a lot of NO’s that have to come in the business in the early game. I have to say NO to what I don’t want in order to say YES to other things.
Yesterday I told a healing client about my new price, the fact that I only work during the day, and that I only work for skype. I’m no longer in the game of giving individual healing sessions. I was nervous because it was like saying NO. My heart was pounding fast. And still it was a big step in the right direction. A half hour later I had someone in my one-on-one time at my new price!!!
Congrats on your recent win, Nathalie. That’s fantastic!
I am building my business. Working on getting out there. I haven’t had to say no yet. I know there will be times that I do. I actually I have said no. I have a person who knows many functional doctors which is who i network with at groups. She sells Do Terra oil. She wanted me to come to every training every thursday of the month.
I told her that I had other committments and I that wouldnt work. Was there one meeting a month that was geared to doctors than other times. She said yes and she seems to be ok with it. I do know i have to do what works for me and my business. Otherwise it becomes a job and I am depending on everyone else. I wont have the life or the business that I want.
Sounds like you’re doing what you need to do for you, Connie, and that’s what’s most important!
I really liked Connie’s comment above. I find it much easier to say no when I say yes at the same time. What this can look like when the no and yes are an equal exchange, is “No, I can’t make the meeting on Thursday, but I have these days available next week.” And this is what it looks like when I’m totally getting out of something, “I can’t make it for coffee, but I love that you reached out.” The yes is always a give-back, even if it’s a give-back of warnth and appreciation. The No that’s hardest for me is the No to myself, and it’s usually always related to priorities, not doing one thing I want to do because something else really is more important. Keeping my goals front and center helps with this. Thanks for the post Jenny. I’m so glad I found you – actually sent here by Jackie Johnstone!
Great way to look at it, Eva. Thanks for sharing that perspective of a no with a yes.
I LOVE Jackie Johnstone — such an amazing person and talented business woman. So glad she sent you here. Welcome!
I am laughing because I JUST posted on my Facebook wall, “I am learning that NO is a complete sentence!”
It’s something I have had to continually practice this week and it’s true, the longer we are in business, the more people want to be a part of our energy.
But when we are super laser clear on what our priorities are, then decision-making and turning someone down is way easier.
In short: Saying NO is an act of self-love.
ps: FREE script (for anyone on here who hates having uncomfortable conversations…) enjoy these 4 steps! I use them all the time!
This is funny: “NO is a complete sentence!” And so true! I’m glad you’re practicing this in you own live and business, and thank you for sharing your tips with us! xo